Contractions and ejections and explanations and congratulations and a toasted bagel with butter before the world stopped, just for a moment.

It was deep night and all was silent – but her body had roared opened and she had become the center of the universe and her bed would never look the same. How could she sleep?

At 4:21am, I was left alone in darkness, with my mother sleeping downstairs, my son sleeping in his room, and my husband and daughter passed out next to me in bed.

After the midwives left, she did not do as she was told and remained wide awake, staring at the new human who had left her body.

Inspiration sentence:
The next morning, she did what any reasonable person would do and went to the library.
(from p.32 of Nightbitch by Rachel Yoder)

1.) This land was once an uninhabited island owned by the Algonquin-speaking Lenape who sold it in 1643 to the English colonists who used it to fish and farm salt hay, but no one lived here for two centuries.

2.) I can’t imagine this was once an uninhabited island because the terrain, with all the high rises lining the seashore, now casts a shadow over its past — I often wonder about the destruction we have inflicted upon this place with our humanity.

3.) Baymen and farmers would come from far away to fish and harvest salt hay; in 1643 the English colonists bought the island from the Algonquin-speaking Lenape.

Sentence 3 above inspired by this sentence from The Orchid Thief by Susan Orlean:
Birders used to come from as far away as Cuba and leave with enough plumes to decorate thousands of ladies’ hats; in the 1800s one group of birders took home eight tons of birds’ eggs.

Coffee, chaos, klonopin.

If alcohol is liquid courage, then coffee must be liquid mania…until you crash, get palpitations, and need to take your anxiety meds.

“When will he choose me among the group to lessen his suffering?

I heard my pill bottle describe the beginning of the serene and the end of caffeine.

Sentence 4 is inspired by Beloved by Toni Morrison. Page 132 “Heard Cherokee men describe the beginning of the world and it’s end.”

I’ll tell you the exact moment: Standing in the Super 8 Motel parking lot, backseat door ajar and me cradled behind it, cold rain pounding onto my skull and paltry jean jacket, pleading with my 74-pound puppy to please get out of the car so we could go inside, her gazing through the plastic cone-of-doom strapped around her neck, trembling from too much anesthesia or not enough, with those blank, bottomed-out pupils. Not budging. The rain, now sideways on my skull.

–
Hurricane Ida hit, and I willed us through it.

–
You think you’ve got all the resolve in the world, independent woman, until you’re crouching over a dope-drunk puppy, eyes pleading what the fuck did you let them do to me, ma.

–

And then standing in the Super 8 motel parking lot, crouching over a spay surgery-drunk puppy, all my resolve was completely useless—resolve completely against all 74 pounds of her—and her whimpering and not budging, poor Casino, me soaked and knotted full of guilt, the thing I’ve always feared would happen when I left Ben, going broke and ruining this sweet dog, and here it is, it’s happening.

Inspired by Jo Ann Beard’s “Festival Days”: And then driving without even knowing I was doing it in the four blocks to the shelter, where I couldn’t stand to be—all those dogs in all those cages—and the first dog out, humping my leg and then getting loose, poor Georgie, and me frantic and frightened, the thing I’ve always been afraid of in my years of volunteering, letting a dog get loose, and there it is happening.

In case you want to try to hear what Questlove hears when he listens to funk in E minor, here’s Sly and the Family Stone–and, for comparison, Raydio.

In case you’re interested in seeing the scene Tracey Thorn from the TV interview with Lindy Morrison, here it is, from a show called Blah Blah Blah. The interviewer is Andrew Denton. You can see his glasses and tinted hair here.

The double helix diagram is a color-coded spiral ladder with chemical-base rungs.

Every day, I climbed it and swung around, exploring, gobsmacked. Chromosomes are the tiniest, hugest things in the world.

If you believe the nurture theory, they’re unimportant (as plenty of smart people who love me proclaimed confidently:“It’s just sperm!”). But if you believe the nature theory, they’re the end-all be-all.

….

“There’s no road map for this,” he said, “but I believe we’ll find our way.”

Excerpts are from a NY Times article, “A Stranger Looked Like My Twin: That Was Just the Beginning.” How a family secret was unraveled by 23andMe.” Written by Kama Einhorn.

“This isn’t fun anymore, and I can’t remember what it was like when it was.”

The couch was so comfortable; she remembered buying it with Herbert several years ago. He stared at her now with his big, watery eyes like he expected her to say something.

The room was quiet, her husband was sad, and her mouth was dry.

There were so many things to consider in that moment, not the least of which was a sentence or two to conclude the life she’d had, one she’d shared with the man whose hand was now in hers, hairy and cool.

Inspired by Albert Camus, The Plague: “I was very fond of you, but now I’m so, so tired.”

You need to listen for footsteps.

One might think that sturdy, silent floors were better for being undetected, but it was more important for Breitwieser to hear for potential witnesses than to keep quiet.

He could easily hear people approach on creaky wooden floors.

Older buildings were ideal targets- the louder the floors, the easier it was to hear people further away.

From the article, The Secrets of the World’s Greatest Art Thief by Michael Finkel: “When it comes to museum flooring, creaky old wood is ideal, so even with his back turned, Breitwieser can hear footsteps two rooms away.”